The first time I listened to “Ribs,” and I mean, really listened, was in a crowded train cart. I was in high school and had my wired earbuds in. I stared into space. The song oscillated from ear to ear. I felt surrounded by it.
The first time I listened to “Green Light” was in my favorite study spot. I was in college and the music video had just dropped. It was different from her last album. I wasn’t sure if I liked it. It was my most played song of that year.
The first time I listened to “Solar Power” was in my childhood bedroom. I was working from home and the song had just leaked. We were slowly coming out of quarantine. The sun was shining. I started crying in the middle of the work day.
The first time I listened to “What Was That” was on a Thursday spring morning. I was going for a run. The song had its official release seven hours prior, and two days before that, had an impromptu screening at Washington Square Park. Lorde appeared at the event, filming for the song’s music video. I avoided the snippets that flooded the internet, wanting to hear the song on my own terms for the first time.
A minute in, I started tearing up. I texted my friend, “we’re so back.” A minute later, I followed that up with, “i feel like how i felt when i heard green light for the first time.”
“What Was That” is a song that’s trapped in memory. It recalls the past, and in doing so, the emotions are heightened. These moments are on repeat, either analyzing them for understanding or yearning for them to come back. The feeling of embarrassment, the flutter of the stomach, the volume of a laugh.
At the same time, the song still lives in the present. It lives in the moment when the memory spiral ends, coming back to the present self—the realization that it’s not that serious, the reasons why it could’ve never worked out, the consciousness of current circumstances.
Though “Green Light” and “What Was That” both center heartbreak, they’re not quite the same. The former is desperate to get over it, to will the time and emotion away, while the latter realizes that getting over it means understanding it first.
“Green Light” is still asking for permission to let go—“'Cause honey, I'll come get my things, but I can't let go / I'm waiting for it, that green light, I want it”—signaling a desire for closure, but not quite being there yet. The song talks about the past with a reproachfulness: “Did it frighten you / How we kissed when we danced on the light up floor?”
“What Was That” is already at that point of closure. When the chorus remincises on the past, there isn’t that same bitterness that’s found in “Green Light.” It’s almost nostalgic: “MDMA in the back garden, blow our pupils up / We kissed for hours straight … I remember saying then, ‘This is the best cigarette of my life.’” This reflection comes not out of a determination to forget and move on, but rather, to reflect on what happened, in order to move on. With this, the song details the relationship disconnect that made the split inevitable: “I didn't know then, but you'd never be enough” and “You had to know this was happening / You weren't feeling my heat.”
The title then can be taken as a question both to the ex-lover, but also to the self. To the ex, retroactively asking what all of their romantic actions meant, if it was all going to end eventually. And to the self, asking to make sense of the past with the context of the present.
I’ve been a Lorde fan for a very long time. She’s been in the spotlight since she was a teen and has been making music since I was one, too. It means that as she matures and grows under this public eye, so does her art—her first album of angst, her second album of solitude, her third album of renewal. Now, this highly anticipated fourth album feels like it builds on all of the previous ones, as an album of growth. To make it here, we have had to experience all that came before.
Ultimately, there’s no clear “getting over it” in the song. It’s still locked in its memories and searching for an answer. And though the past doesn’t change, our relationship to it certainly does. That’s how we make peace with it all, isn’t it?
This isn’t the first time I’ve written about Lorde (surprise!). You can read my previous writing about her below :-)
“Solar Power Tour” (December 2022)
“Cancer Season Interlude” (July 2024)
Some recs:
“Green Light (Chromeo Remix)” by Lorde
“No Better” by Lorde
Solar Power by Lorde
This was February’s recommendation and it’s timeless xx
You can read my previous post here: The Sun Rises on the Reaping.
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